joy

I'm exhausted. I had one of the longest days of my life yesterday, got less than 7 hours of sleep and had to be up at five to start a new day. If I could have an IV of coffee pouring into my veins, that would be appreciated. But today, I sit here at my job that I don't really want to be doing, trying to work on things, trying to fight sleepiness...

and I feel this immense joy in my heart.

joy n.
a. Intense and especially ecstatic or exultant happiness.
b. The expression or manifestation of such feeling.

I know, given my current circumstances, that the only reason I can feel this joy is because of God. It's more than just an emotion; it's a soul-deep peace that sparkles in your eyes. When I feel it, I remember... after all that time of not having it, that long year and a half, I remember when my best friend told me, "You've got your joy back."
That soul-touching joy that comes from trusting and following my LORD, Yahweh.

The LORD is my strength and my shield;
my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.
My heart leaps for joy
and I will give thanks to him in song. -Psalm 28:7

It has nothing to do with external things. Just internal trust and hope.
There is nothing that I like about my circumstances.
but He is my strength and my delight.
amen.