new year, new...?

This year is starting off hard. Harder than I had anticipated. Which is adding to the frustrations I already had about coming into this year.
My clothes don't fit anymore because I've gotten lazy. Breaking that cycle and becoming disciplined again is going to be difficult, but I know that it will be worth it... and that I will be a much better person with the discipline of running and keeping myself healthy.
I also have 3+ more months being a slave to MSU and the school I am working at. It's incredibly difficult, considering I don't really want to do this for a career and the kids are relentless and not really wanting to learn Spanish.
These were frustrations I already had coming into the year.

Now... I started my last MSU classes to complete the internship. It's looking like a ton of work, all in preparation for getting a teaching job come summer. Which is not what I want. Not at all.
On top of that, my best friend is continuing her internship in full-time mission work overseas. And another good friend of mine has decided to pursue that as well. As excited as I am for both of them for being willing to go... it's so hard for me to sit back and be here because my heart is so willing to go, too...

I know that the Lord has different plans for me... and I have to just be patient and let those unfold... it's just hard.

New Year, new hardship....
learning to cling to the Lord more and more....