questions, questions...

This past week on the way to work... I was asking myself why I'm doing this.

Why am I here? Why am I coming back to high school when it wasn't the greatest experience for me? Why?

I see so many kids that just break my heart. Mostly girls. I can see the insecurity in their eyes. I can see those ones that are looking to guys to give them worth and feel like they're something special. I can spot them so easy and it breaks my heart... because that used to be me. I want to show them that they don't have to do that, that they are worth something...

by teaching them Spanish?

...something doesn't sit right about that with me...

That's because the One thing that will give them worth... I can't talk to them about. That's why I don't think this is for me. Yes, being able to speak another language is an amazing skill and I think everyone should speak at least two languages... but whether they can speak Spanish or not isn't going to save their souls. It's not going to give them rest. It's not going to give them purpose. It's not going to restore them. No.

Lo que pasa es que... sólo Dios puede salvar y dar luz... yo, no... ni la capacidad de hablar otro idioma.

y te pregunto otra vez, Señor.... ¿por qué estoy aquí?