pre-adventures

So tomorrow is the start of the adventures... No, school doesn't start tomorrow, I'm meeting with my mentor teacher to set up our classroom and talk about things for the year.
Exciting, right?

I feel like it should be, but for some reason I'm really not. I feel very indifferent about starting student-teaching. Maybe it's because I still don't know what to expect. I mean, I have a rough idea of what's going to happen... but I have no idea what this is going to be like. I think I'm a little more nervous than anything else. I don't know what the kids are like, I don't know what the curriculum is like, I don't really know how my teacher teaches, I don't know what the district is like....

And what makes me the most nervous of all is how settled my heart is about doing this... about teaching... and about the possibility of God changing my heart to like it. I have confronted my fear of God changing my heart and now I'm at peace with it. And that makes me nervous, because I know He's going to do something through all of my experiences this year.... I just have NO idea what it's going to be...

Trusting when I can't see... that's the game, isn't it?

Thank You, Lord, that You already know my steps before I take them. Help me to continue trusting in You and relying on You for what I need... I know I can't do this on my own... and I don't want to...

Vamos para el caos...